If you're a regular reader of this blog, you probably know by now that we're none too fond of Mr. Andre Ware who called for the sky to fall in Chicken Little style during the preseason, sighting coaching changes, graduation, and transfers as the main reasons why BC would struggle to win (and I quote): "Probably two, possibly three games this year".
With the Eagles set to finish the season with nine wins after a bowl victory, Andre has the possibility of being seven wins off. That's got to be some sort of record.
In the spirit of the great Nostradumbass Andre Ware, we provide you with some other nuggets that Andre has submitted as sure-fire prognostications for the future.
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1M) The Titanic will sail forever
Sure, there were some structural issues with the
hull and having a captain tip back Exxon-Valdez style doesn't really help matters either, but Andre is confident that this magnificent vessel will sail the seas for decades to come.
2W) Man on moon
This just will never happen.
Man was made to live on earth , not to travel. It's just not normal no matter what.
Plus the moon is made of cheese.
3M) Michael Jackson will never get more than two songs on the radio
Possibly three, but the competition from other artists
are just too strong. Michael Jackson was lucky to have stumbled upon some good lyrics in the past and happened to have a good choreographer for his first video, but he's since moved on. The most anyone can really expect from Michael is two or maybe three songs on the radio.
4W) Tiger Woods faithful
Look at this picture
it is a happy home, and Tiger is the model citizen, he is 100% above the type of life that most people live.. and happiness keeps people faithful.. just watch and see.
5M) Andre Ware: Pro-Bowler
Andre's most obvious prediction is that Andre Ware
will be a sure-fire NFL Pro-Bowler, possibly a Hall-of-Fame quarterback.
He won't, under any circumstances, be a joke of a Heisman winner who will get laughed out of the league. That will never happen.
6W) The World is Flat
Well it is... and dont go out and try to test that.. Because you will most certainly perish!
So take the Andre Advice and keep it between the ditches.
7M) Bernie Madoff made me a Millionaire, and he can make you one, too.
You have to be careful where you get your advice
from--particularly financial advice. Andre Ware isn't going to lead you astray here: Bernie Madoff will make you rich. Andre isn't exactly sure of how the whole thing works, but he knows that Bernie is a solid fellow with a lot of character who would never let anyone down, which is important if you are going to trust someone with you life savings like Andre has.
8W) The internet will never catch on
This is for rich folks.. not common people..
The Internet is just a bunch of geeks and wont be used for normal every day things. It's a fad I say, a fad..
9M) Charlie Weis will lead Notre Dame back to the promised land
Sometimes coaching hires are a crap-shoot. You need
a guy who is going to relate to his fanbase and alums, someone who is going to get the very most out of every player he has, and a guy who can really motivate a team to go a big winning streak. Notre Dame has found that coach in Charlie Weis. Andre agrees with Charlie that ND will have an "X's and O's advantage" over every opponent they play. Cheer, Cheer for ol' Charlie Weis, the good times are sure to follow.
10W) The SEC will never have players in trouble with the law
Have you ever seen a bunch of good ole fellas? They know about respect, honor, and just doing the right thing. Andre predicts that the SEC will be unblemished by any of thier guys ever doing anything to shine a bad light on them, thier family or University.
RECAP
BCMike drafted: Titanic sails forever, MJ is a one-hit-wonder, Andre Ware: Pro-Bowler, Madoff, Charlie Weis
Wesley drafted: Man on moon, Tiger Woods faithful, World is flat, Internet, SEC is crime-free
Posts
sheer genius, love it, nice job guys im laughing my arse off
ReplyDeleteQuite simply the great blog in BC blog history...except for the part where man will walk on the moon...that never actually happened...right Andre?
ReplyDelete